Walk Away

May 10, 2011

Ellen Von Unwerth

  • You always meet the most interesting/coolest people in the smoking section.
  • Jealousy is very very ugly, try to hide it/control it.
  • There is no need to tell someone the negative things others have said about them!
  • Dudes – if you’re crushing on a girl then don’t talk about the others girls you are supposedly texting/hooking up with.
  • Love transcends time, place, age, race and gender – if you feel the electricity then hang onto it!
  • There is a huge difference between bitching about something someone has done and just bitching about someone in general.
  • Release the choker hold or you will drive him/her away!
  • It’s a lovely sentiment, but you can’t save everyone from themselves – you had to learn and so should they. Now turn and walk away.
  • Ever noticed the person who does the chasing normally does the dumping?
  • People are falling in love all the time, don’t feel left out – it’s just the universe weeding out the losers and mis-matches!

Love Jecca xx

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  • Save any nice emails or texts, when you’re having a shitty you can use them as a reference to remind you that you are loved!
  • Don’t lower your standards and sleep with just anyone, but sometimes another person lying next to you/on top of you is all you need to feel refreshed/sane.
  • That last point was a total contradiction
  • Keep your resume up to date at all times – even if you note down accomplishments etc in a notebook to reference later on, it will help!
  • If you know someone who’s new in town, don’t be scared of them – take them out, show them the cool spots, introduce them to people – it’s a big world out there, imagine if you were new to a place, building a life and no one did this for you?! Yea, not pleasant right?
  • Don’t have loud private conversations in public, you obnoxious twit!
  • Thanks for the lovely letter Ms Lala, you 100% made my day/week.
  • Cut the crap
  • Talk to your Grandparents, listen to their stories from when they were younger
  • I really really don’t care what kind of car you drive, and nope, I don’t want to see a picture of it on your iPhone
  • If you happen to stumble across a beautiful man with blue eyes, cool shoes and a killer smile, then ask him out. Don’t be such a wimp!
  • If they don’t reply to your last 4 texts, they probably aren’t interested in being your friend or your lover. You are a fantastic person, don’t waste your time on peeps like that!
  • It’s SPRING here in the Northern hemisphere, I spent the weekend planting bright flowers in pots. Get your hands dirty and plant something pretty, it’s so refreshing!

It’s All Happening

January 28, 2011

  • Bloody Hell! It’s 2011, when did that happen? My head is spinning off!
  • Resolutions? Just be realistic my dears.
  • If you haven’t been to Las Vegas then go, immediately! And invite me!
  • Nothing worth having comes easily (OK, sometimes it does)
  • Remember that there is the exception and the rule. Live by the rule, but always aspire to be the exception!
  • People change. Sometimes it’s great, and sometimes it will kill you.
  • While we are on the topic of resolutions –  If you are going to try a diet, and I am sure you are lovely just the way you are! But IF you are, then I recommend the South Beach diet. It’s tough the first few days, but the change is almost instantaneous, and that is SO encouraging! And if you need support I’m right here, promise!
  • Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.
  • Dog parks – totally new experience for me, a great place for meeting cute boys/men. But beware, they are usually OBSESSED with their dogs. Ugh
  • Get rid of the pens that make your handwriting look ugly.
  • If you are a guest, don’t show up empty handed, and offer to help.
  • If you are having a shitty day, go to the nearest Anthrolpologie store and all will be well again, it’s so magic and swooney! You might find a nice new pen there.
  • Focus on the love – send it out, be open to it, make people feel loved, love yourself.
  • A watched phone will never ring, and a watched inbox will never receive mail.
  • Kiss a cute boy with a lip piercing on New Years Eve on the strip in Las Vegas. Awesome awesome awesome, yes!
  • Write thank you notes and letters, keep it alive people!
  • Keep a notebook with you at all times so you can write down any lightbulb moments throughout your day.
  • Yes Yes, I know you are terrified but please for the love of God take the plunge already! Cut your hair, change you job, take the trip, kiss the babe, say what you think (tactfully and respectfully of course!) make the call, go to the Doctor, paint your toenails, break-up.
  • You are an adult and that means you can do anything you want!

Chatterbox

December 10, 2010

  • Guess what? YOU have the ability to change your mind. Gasp! I know I know, totally new idea right?
  • Spoon with a person you just met, especially a cute one!
  • Hey YOU, yes YOU, stop eating with your fucking disgusting mouth open. 
  • Have you written your Christmas cards? Do it right now! Don’t be such a grinch-slacker!
  • No baby talk thank you very much, you’re adult and you’re making me sick.
  • Sneakers and jeans? Sure, wear them if you want, but don’t expect to get laid ever again.
  • Put your phone away – I absolutely do not want to see a photo slide show of your stupid DOG. No no, really, I don’t fucking care.
  • There is no magical fix for anything, the sooner you realise this the better.
  • Dress appropriately for your body type, it won’t automatically look good on you if it’s in fashion, find a way to make it work for you or don’t wear it at all.
  • Are you moisturising your whole body like I told you to AGES ago?
  • Don’t whine, please please just shut up and stop whining.
  • For guaranteed smiles get some photos developed and stick them all around the place.
  • Try to avoid keeping your social life restricted to the weekends, do fun stuff during the week too, I don’t care if your tired, your making ME tired with all of this complaining.
  • Ummm, sorry, but is that an ugly pair of knickers I see in your drawer? Dispose of them right now, there is only time for cute underwear in this life – that way you can be prepared at all times for sex/accidental Marilyn Monroe moments. Dudes, this applies to you too.
  • If you make the choice to forgive someone then you are the asshole if you bring it up in future arguments.
  • Advent calendars make it socially acceptable to eat chocolate for breakfast.
  • No no, tights are not pants, if I can see your crotch you’ve got it all wrong.
  • Stop trying so hard. I’m sure your cool enough to just be yourself!
  • 87 cups of green tea and a face mask will not reverse the effects of your alcohol binge from last night, but it’s peace of mind nonetheless –  and there’s a small chance it’s doing something.
  • If it takes you more than 2 weeks to reply to a message on Facebook or an email, then you are a bad friend. Take the 2 minutes to reply, even if just to say “I’m so sorry, my house blew up and I broke both of my hands, so I’m using my nose to type, will write back properly in a few weeks.”
  • In this life not everyone is going to like you. I know, it sucks because your totally rad. 
  • Give your Mum a break, she gave birth to you! Do you have any idea how painful that was?
  • If someone wants to do something nice for you then stop protesting and just let them.
  • Smile darling.

Jecca xx

Things are looking up, It must be all of that fresh snow Vancouver had over the weekend. Along with the wonderful whiteness comes a sense of quiet and calm.

A few favorite things over the past few weeks:

  • Receiving Letters
  • Family SKYPE dates
  • Watching my sister go through an incredibly tough time with grace, dignity and clarity. My god I miss you!
  • Friends who have good news
  • Trip planning
  • New Friends who you just LOVE instantly
  • Listening to Katy Perry’s ‘Firework’ – if you’re having a shitty day, LISTEN to it. Katy, you’re so bloody brilliant
  • People you can rely on who offer help and advice when you feel completely lost
  • My friend Sam. Just…thank you
  • Long conversations with my Grandparents on snowy Sunday afternoons and realising  just how similar we are.
  • My Grandma showing me off to all of her friends at Church
  • Doing things purely for love – yes, I actually went to Church!
  • Fresh snow
  • Going to Ice Hockey games
  • Possible hangout’s with boys
  • Collecting pictures and ideas for my dream home – for when I become a grown up
  • TREEHOUSES (totally and completely obsessed)

Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse, the best!!

Aren’t they lovely!

Love Jecca xx

My darlings,

This will be my last post for a while, I’m not sure when I will next have the internet! I Hope soon though.

Don’t know where I will be or what I will be doing…oh em gee!

Ah! Can’t believe this is all happening, it’s so exciting!

Barely slept a wink last night, here are a few thoughts that passed through my head…

  • Be well
  • Have fun
  • Laugh until it hurts so much
  • Take risks
  • Jump right in
  • Hold on
  • Quit smoking – I did! It smells so bad!
  • Be open to whatever may happen
  • Kiss your Boyfriend/Girlfriend
  • Travel
  • Look in the Mirror, really look
  • Appreciate just how amazing your friends are, do you know how lucky you are to have people like that in your life?! VERY lucky!
  • Keep your passport safe, apparently identity theft is RIFE!
  • If your don’t have a passport then get one, right now! How are you supposed to come and visit me if you don’t have one?
  • Eclipse was OK, Rob is still a total baberoo!
  • Remember Me is the crappiest movie I’ve seen in ages. 9/11? Really? You just had to go there didn’t you? For fucks sake, what a BORE!
  • I’m not saying 9/11 was a bore, I’m saying the movie was! Jeeez relax!
  • Smile
  • Love yourself, you’re actually pretty damn cool/babe-ish!

Until next time…

Jecc xx

  • Don’t be rude to your waiter/waitress, what are you, stupid!? They handle your food.
  • Go for a walk in the rain and jump in puddles, it’s SO fun!
  • Make plans, always have something to look forward to, you might die of boredom otherwise!
  • Say please and thank you
  • Keep in touch with your friends, make the effort
  • Good Sex will cure 90% of your mental issues. For serious.

  • Just because you are kinda seeing someone does not mean your life and responsibilities have to go on the back burner, make it on YOUR terms, yeash, grow a back bone!
  • If you are hooking up with a dude and he tells you from the beginning that’s it’s only fun then he means it, don’t secretly hope that he will fall in love with you. You don’t want to fall in love with the guy who says “this is just fun”
  • Don’t talk about how much money you have, you fucking jerkface! In fact don’t talk about money at all, it’s SO crass.
  • Don’t get into physical fights, it makes you look like an asshole/if you do then you are an asshole!
  • Be open to the possibility that you just might fall in love, c’mon man, don’t be so closed off and scared! Ya big baby. It’s just LOVE, Not like, AIDS or something. You will recover if it all turns to Hell, and if not, there’s always Vodka!
  • It’s not very often that you meet new people who are genuinely great and amazing, people who you just click with – but when you do it will light you up, hold on to that for dear life.
  • Be nice to people
  • Learn to use a knife and fork properly you crazy wild animal!
  • Have sexxx with foreigners, and if you can, get them to talk dirty to you in their native tounge while you do it, it’s the hottest thing EVER, go on! EVERYBODY is doing it. It’s the new black.

Love Jecca xx

What’s My Age Again?

April 4, 2010

I recently heard a theory from a dude-friend.

It went something like this:

For the most part (and I use this phrase first because generalising is always stupid and dangerous), if a Guy is 35 years old that would be approx 25 in Girl years. An 18 year old girl is approximately the same age as a 25 year old guy.  So if you apply the 5 – 10 year age difference rule then you would probably get a decent maturity match. But only if the girl is younger, if a 35 year old woman is dating/sexxing an 18 year old, you might get stoned in the street – but whatevs man, Coug it up I say! I’m not judging you, I’m just warning you, it’s not my prejudice, it’s societies issues, but mind you, Couger’s are very in Vogue, It’s the new Black…so do it, jump on the band wagon or the nearest 19 year old hottie and go with it!

BUT, I was in a  relationship with someone who was my own age for 3 years, and that was just fine…I guess it all depends on the person, but there were maturity challenges for sure! Anyways, enough of that rubbish. I’m not getting into that now. But if any of you ladies who have been in relationship with a dude in his early to mid 20’s I’m sure you already know what these challenges are…and if you don’t then you are either going out with the rare exception or your a fucking idiot. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing at all, I’m just making an observation, don’t be so defensive dude! Mind you, us ladies are no walk in the park either, I mean we are great but we aren’t without challenges either…but that’s a whole other post.

So, in theory I should be dating a 30 – 35 year old, I want a MAN, or a Man-dude, a man who is cool but has a good job, is driven and ambitious, but goes surfing on the weekends and maybe skateboards to work in his super awesome suit. He is well spoken but not pretentious, he is a cutie but doesn’t know it. He can pay for dinner, he can afford to go on a  holiday with you, he has traveled, isn’t scared to talk about the future…Man-Dude will come home from his super cool job and talk shop with you and listen to your work stories from your super great job and provide intelligent and insightful pointers.  He will also be awesome and cool to your friends and family, and genuinely love them. He will go out with his friends on the weekend and you with yours and you won’t worry or be jealous because 1) you aren’t like that and 2) he thinks you are the bestestestest EVER. He is proud that YOU are is HIS Girlfriend. And then you will listen to the Killers together and talk utter rubbish and act like 20 year olds because although he is a MAN he is still a DUDE.

MAN-DUDE!

Fuck! I can’t wait to meet this guy!

xx

P.S – To all of my dude friends, you are the Man-Dudes described above, how lucky your girlfriends are! I Love you.

It’s been 9 weeks since we broke up, and the moments of sadness are becoming much less frequent.

Can you believe it’s been 9 Weeks? Thanks to all of you for reading this and being there each step of the way.

It's Magic!

I feel stronger, happier and I am getting back to the way I used to be when I wasn’t propping somebody else up – it feels good!

My life is all about me, my gorgeous friends and family! It’s ridiculous how liberating it is. I go to the gym 4 days a week now; I’m challenging myself and have even joined a Gym Boot Camp. I would NEVER have done that 3 months ago. In fact, me from 3 months ago would be jealous the new ‘gym going’ me.

Well, the old and unmotivated me can take a hike, I have zero time for that now. I have goals and I have a plan!

Here are some things that I enjoy as part of my new single life:

  • Going for drinks and dinner during the week
  • Staying out until 5am on the weekends, meeting cool and interesting people
  • Viva Mexico on Saturday’s with my Flatmates (best Mexican food in Wellington)
  • Playing Pinball and smoking cigarettes with cute boys
  • Going to new bars
  • Using eye cream
  • Flirting
  • Calling friends overseas
  • Moisturising my entire body – do it ladies (or guys), you will thank me for the results!
  • Getting facials/beauty treatments
  • Getting my hair done did
  • Listening to new music
  • I don’t get scared of the dark anymore
  • I can sleep alone now
  • I enjoy doing only my laundry, not someone else’s
  • Going to the Gym
  • Being FREE

I hope YOU are having a good day, and remember you never know what is around the corner, it’s your life — make sure you aren’t asleep at the wheel!

Love Lady Jecca xx

The Grind: Part 1

November 9, 2009

A few things that have been grinding my gears:

1. The font style ‘Arial’ – so boring, I have to use it at work and even exclamation points don’t make it look more entertaining/interesting!

2. When people at work use the phrase “I just wanted to advise you.” ADVISE me! That’s overuse of the English language. How about I “advise” you that you’re a Fuckwit?

3. Being hungover and starving but being too scared to leave the house in case people on the street judge you for looking like a mess/wild animal.

4. Ed Hardy and people who wear it:

Bret Michaels

Yuck!

5. Girls who wear Boob tube, ass skimming dresses out on a Saturday night when it’s hailing. COVER UP bitches, it’s a coat, not man repellent. No one wants a girl with goose pimpled flesh (well, maybe dudes wearing Ed Hardy)

6. Honking your car horn when the traffic clearly ISN’T moving.  Please shut the fuck up.

7. Girls who wear scrunchies. You know who you are and I needn’t explain myself because you KNOW why I have brought this up!  I hope your shame eats you alive.

8. 3pm to 5pm – useless times of the day, nothing good happens between these hours, best to be napping when this time occurs.

9. Girls who have boyfriends who think you (the single girl) are an instant threat, don’t flatter yourself !

10. People who get into an elevator and ride DOWN 1 floor – there is a special place in Hell for you.