I was doing the grocery shop for work the other day at New World Metro. I was in my usual hurry when I heard the most gorgeous British Accent “excuse me Miss, can I interest you in donating to the Paralympics?”

Swoon!

For starters you called me ‘Miss’ in a British accent, you can have whatever you like, If I still had my virginity I would SO have given you that.

Not only did he have a totally cute accent but he was astonishingly good looking! I actually stopped and stared, but just for a minute.

We had a brief chat about me donating and he pointed out that they only took cash, I didn’t have any on me but promised I would be back later.  I spent the whole morning figuring out what I would say, you know, all of the usual lame things that come with being single in the battlefield that is coupledom/dating.

The moment came, he remembered me and was very impressed I actually went back. Swoon!

I got a pin to say that I had donated. Again, we only spoke briefly.

Essentially I paid $20 for a cute guy to talk to me.

Nicely played Paralympics. Very nicely played indeed.

It’s been 9 weeks since we broke up, and the moments of sadness are becoming much less frequent.

Can you believe it’s been 9 Weeks? Thanks to all of you for reading this and being there each step of the way.

It's Magic!

I feel stronger, happier and I am getting back to the way I used to be when I wasn’t propping somebody else up – it feels good!

My life is all about me, my gorgeous friends and family! It’s ridiculous how liberating it is. I go to the gym 4 days a week now; I’m challenging myself and have even joined a Gym Boot Camp. I would NEVER have done that 3 months ago. In fact, me from 3 months ago would be jealous the new ‘gym going’ me.

Well, the old and unmotivated me can take a hike, I have zero time for that now. I have goals and I have a plan!

Here are some things that I enjoy as part of my new single life:

  • Going for drinks and dinner during the week
  • Staying out until 5am on the weekends, meeting cool and interesting people
  • Viva Mexico on Saturday’s with my Flatmates (best Mexican food in Wellington)
  • Playing Pinball and smoking cigarettes with cute boys
  • Going to new bars
  • Using eye cream
  • Flirting
  • Calling friends overseas
  • Moisturising my entire body – do it ladies (or guys), you will thank me for the results!
  • Getting facials/beauty treatments
  • Getting my hair done did
  • Listening to new music
  • I don’t get scared of the dark anymore
  • I can sleep alone now
  • I enjoy doing only my laundry, not someone else’s
  • Going to the Gym
  • Being FREE

I hope YOU are having a good day, and remember you never know what is around the corner, it’s your life — make sure you aren’t asleep at the wheel!

Love Lady Jecca xx

Oh No You Didn’t

November 23, 2009

Today a work colleague told me that I should try online dating.

A red mist appeared before my eyes and all I wanted to do was run head first into the nearest wall.

Hiss!

“Oh no, someone is single, they must be so unhappy and so desperate for a man they will do ANYTHING.”

Needless to say, someone’s stationary is going to go ‘missing’ from their cubicle. Ha, that’s right you fucking moron, the line has been drawn and I have more time on my hands now that I am single, more time to plot and plan and take you down.

This is going to be EPIC.

Our Time is Running Out

November 20, 2009

I’ve been pondering death and the prospect of dying quite a bit lately.

It’s a very strange moment when you realise your own mortality. How is that we go through life without really thinking about it, or at the very least, fixating on it? It’s a pretty big fucking deal!

I was 16 when it first dawned on me that I was actually going to die. It was a strange thing to realise, I wasn’t scared or anything, just baffled that I hadn’t realised it sooner, how could it have taken me so long to pay attention to this detail of my (after) life when it’s one of the only certainties in life?!

 

 

The prospect of death bothers me most when I think of my loved ones, on the rare occasions when I fight/get mad at someone I always try to make things right straight away, imagine if they died and I had said something hurtful to them?! That’s one of my worst nightmares! I also keep all of my voicemails from friends and family, that way, if they die then I will always be able to hear their voices.

Sorry if this post has depressed you, it wasn’t my intention – I’m being philosophical rather than morbid, and I’m really wondering if anyone thinks about death like I do? Am I just a sicko? Or a realist?

What are your thoughts on death, dying and taxes?

xx

Something Beautiful…

November 16, 2009

I found this Poem a few years ago, but can’t recall how I stumbled across it.

I always refer back to it because I think it is so perfectly and beautifully describes how it feels to be in Love.

LOVER

I don’t just want your heart

I want your flesh,

Your skin,

Your blood and bones,

Your voice, your thoughts

Your pulse

And most of all your fingerprints,

Everywhere.

Nothing is more criminal than love

It steals hours from the day

Dreams from my head,

The sun from the sky.

Perhaps it shone today,

I don’t recall

I distilled all of your words and made my own climate.

– Isobel Thrilling

Silly Girl

November 16, 2009

The weekend was a pretty good one, aptly demonstrated by the fact that it’s Monday and I’m having a mental health day at home, the sun is shining and I just had some excellent coffee, life is definitely bearable.

This weekend I saw 3 of the guys I have been crushing on – it was almost too much to handle, I was all nervous and excited – such a great feeling! The beginning of the weekend was loaded with expectation; Let me tell you how it ended:

Calling my Ex drunk off my ass at 2:30am on Saturday night. Great.

Colored cats

If I end up alone with Cats, this is how they are going to look.

Why did I call him you may ask? I do have a theory, here goes;

I didn’t kiss any of the crushes mentioned above, In fact there was ZERO interest from any of them even though I did my very best to look totes pretty, act cool, flutter my eyelashes etc etc. I guess it was the end of the night and I was just feeling a little lonely and rejected and wanted to speak to someone who had once had a crush on me.

I am actually OK though, I mean, I’m horrible at flirting and the guys probably have no idea that I’m interested – and I figure things always happen for a reason, so reason, if you are reading this, can you please make yourself known? I’m getting a little anxious here!

The other week I had a very pleasant morning With Jess, Chloe and Ella. The sun was shining and I wasn’t wearing a coat, it was going to be a good day.

We checked out the Designer clothing sale at San Fran Bathhouse and decided it was too hideously crowded with Hipster kids, so we bailed for a much needed coffee.

We decided to go to Duke Cavall’s. We sat outside and were served by an extremely chatty waiter; he had nice eyes and a totes cute smile. The girls gently urged me to indulge in some flirting, being the fool that I am, I did.

Here is what unfolded:

He asked for my order, I stared into his eyes for too long and blushed, talked too quickly and played with my hair too much.He came back with my Coffee and was very nice, we were chatting away as I was flicking my sugar sachet, and it flew out of my hand and slapped him in the face and fell to the ground. I could only stare at the ground – forcing him to pick up the aforementioned sugar sachet, making him think I was a complete princess and a klutz to boot. Awesome.

Had I Been wearing these Fab Chanel Heels, I would have removed one of them and shot myself.

Chanel Gun Heels

Love Lady Jecca

x

The Grind: Part 1

November 9, 2009

A few things that have been grinding my gears:

1. The font style ‘Arial’ – so boring, I have to use it at work and even exclamation points don’t make it look more entertaining/interesting!

2. When people at work use the phrase “I just wanted to advise you.” ADVISE me! That’s overuse of the English language. How about I “advise” you that you’re a Fuckwit?

3. Being hungover and starving but being too scared to leave the house in case people on the street judge you for looking like a mess/wild animal.

4. Ed Hardy and people who wear it:

Bret Michaels

Yuck!

5. Girls who wear Boob tube, ass skimming dresses out on a Saturday night when it’s hailing. COVER UP bitches, it’s a coat, not man repellent. No one wants a girl with goose pimpled flesh (well, maybe dudes wearing Ed Hardy)

6. Honking your car horn when the traffic clearly ISN’T moving.  Please shut the fuck up.

7. Girls who wear scrunchies. You know who you are and I needn’t explain myself because you KNOW why I have brought this up!  I hope your shame eats you alive.

8. 3pm to 5pm – useless times of the day, nothing good happens between these hours, best to be napping when this time occurs.

9. Girls who have boyfriends who think you (the single girl) are an instant threat, don’t flatter yourself !

10. People who get into an elevator and ride DOWN 1 floor – there is a special place in Hell for you.

Forgive my absence…

November 3, 2009

But I have been off in another land….

trueblood-mouth2

Yum!

And I must say, it was rather pleasant, the men are gorgeous, devoted and a little bit dangerous, I love it – Louisiana never looked so damn gooood!

The only thing I’m not so fond of is the blood sucking sounds, makes my tummy flip over, but the sex scenes are well worth it, and if things keep going the way they are, this is the closest thing to actual sex I’m going to be getting for a while, sigh. But, I figure great imaginary sex is better than actual rubbish, awkward first time sex – I’m saving that for someone who is worth it.

So, I’m back and I recommend you check out True Blood, its fucking brilliant, and when you realise how good it is, you will forgive me for being gone for so long (and I will forgive you too when you disappear.)

Love Lady Jecca

x

Day 5, Ugh

November 2, 2009

man-walking-away

I write this sitting in my sisters flat, in the spare room/cupboard.

I used to live in this flat, and this room used to be his office – the irony of this didn’t strike me until 3 days after I had moved in, there was no chance of sleep that night. This pissed me off because I was actually attempting to sleep unaided by alcohol or the heavy tranquilizers my Mum had given me. So, I popped a pill and waited for sleep to give my lonely shoulders a hug, and it must have because I did wake up eventually, albeit groggy and disorientated.

I absolutely love that blissful 3 seconds when you wake up and you don’t remember what’s happened, then reality comes along, cautiously taps you on the shoulder and says (very politely I might add) “good morning, sorry to bother you, but I’ve got some quite shit news….”

Here is what runs through my head in the next 10 seconds:

He cheated,

It’s real

We broke up

He isn’t attracted to me anymore (yes, he actually said this)

Am I really that fat?

I think I have a pretty face

Must go to the gym today

I have to work

Please don’t cry at my desk again.

I want my Mum

Would Holly marry me?

How did he do that?

It’s real

It’s real

It’s REAL.

I wish I wasn’t sad

The day wears on, I go to work, it rains, I laugh a few times which was really nice, and my friend Laura from work buys me Miso soup (I have only just started eating again and it was DE -LISH.) It turns out Vodka isn’t the breakfast (or lunch or dinner) of champions, it’s the breakfast of the broken hearted. I really had to get on.

I heard that He had gone through two bottles of Whiskey and other various things over the weekend, that’s a mammoth effort even for him “Hello path of destruction, I might take a stroll if you wouldn’t mind.”

I have to mention here that my girlfriends Holly, Ella, Jessica and my sister Chloe saved my life on that awful day. They ditched work, let me cry, fed me Vodka, took it away again,  packed me up, and then installed me in the spare cupboard at Chloe and Jessica’s flat – even though I’m horribly anally retentive to live with, and bossy.

Chloe is the best sister ever. For a few days I felt like I could breathe again with her by my side, she was the only person I wanted to talk to. I even suggested she try and work remotely and come and sit at my desk with me…a completely unrealistic request – the wonderful thing is that she tried to make it happen, no questions asked.